Saturday, August 23, 2008

Saarang LVC !

Well, LVC here doesn't stand for Long-Visual-Connect but Long-Verbal-Connect (Note that the earlier statement is only for insti quizzers who would be familiar with LVC like terms. If you aren't one, pardon me but if you aren't and yet know about it, Good for you ! )

The following is my entry for the Newsletter Ed's application for Saarang 2009. Hope you enjoy it ! (The theme also is provided below )

Connect :- Saarang-AJ-Time Machine- Lace-Angelina Jolie- E=mc^2—ACM Turing Prize-Booze-Why so Serious ?

The connection is as follows :-

The preparations had begun in full flow for Saarang 2009 with the people in charge of it slogging away ( in some cases like the Design Team, cogging away). Lace was also one of these guys( and gals) trying to get some sleep as he was trying to fix up the loose ends; the fix here being that he could not tie his own Lace ! But as they say, the Saarang Spons Saga was Lace-d with many such instances, with one of them involving him to order a spons coord to approach the ACM Turing Prize panel to donate the prize money as a Sponsorship amount towards Saarang 2009; as cash resources and time, both were running out. Meanwhile, Lace’s co-Core/C(h)or was being his reSPONSible self ordering AJ on how to go about handling “Public Relations” (read- “How to make their Relation Pub(l)ic “).

Now, it so happens that Alan Turing was known to have a Homo-Genius mix of orientation towards Computers and homosexual practices* (of which I daren’t speak of !)

*Quote misquoted from

Hence, the ACM Turing Prize Panel, in accordance with Turing’s final wish, wanted to support homosexuality. Aaand, when they saw the logo of Saarang 2008, they were simply turned ON by it and gave away a huge chunk of the prize money as Sponsorship towards Saarang ’09 only to find that the same money was spent on booze, snuff,etc... So, now that we had cash, Akanksha tried to create a PR stunt by proclaiming to the media (read ‘Newsletter junta’) that AJ was coming to Saarang ‘09; the only glitch being that this stunt flopped worse than Han-Cock. The reason was pretty clear that she didn’t know that she was (in)famously known as AJ^ in IITM whereas the AJ she referred to was Angelina Jolie (or probably Angelina Jolie ‘Pit’t, by the time this piece goes into print).

^- AJ doesn’t stand for Akanksha Jain, but Arrogant Jackass !

This flop disillusioned her about Saarang 09’s look to the public and she was about to resign her Core-ship and offer it to me*** but she was somehow convinced by N2 that even ‘E=mc^2’ was proved only after years of 'hard work' and the same is applicable to Saarang. Well, trust AJ to goof up the simplest of things and she took N2’s words to be as “Hardly working” towards her goal and started boozing until she became a Bo(o)zo !

*** To me, coz she had the best TIME of her life in the most unique TIME machine I gifted her, to create her Moods as per her convenience (now do you get the Time funda ?), on our 7th wedding anniversary .

My friends, That’s the way Saarang 2009 crumbles ! Here I’m, Heath Ledger, Chief Correspondent, Crappy News Network (CNN), signing off . BTW, Why so Serious ??


Shounak said...

hehehehehehe.......Gand maar di Akanksha ki.....hahahahahhaha.....arrogant

I'm a gravy hanger !! said...

@ WD : It was intentional. You see, people respond to their critics first as compared to their fans. ( I never got a reply from a person who i was a fan of but i definitely did get a reply from whom i criticised :P ) I wanted this piece to catch her attention so that i can be made a newsletter ed (only to deng her more:P )

Shounak said...

LOL.....putting fight on Akanksha :P.......Go raghav Go Go!!!!

Boneywasawarriorwayayix said...

:) gawd wonly....

jimmy said...

1.My expectations on Saarang news letter have become rosy.
2.'in some cases like the Design Team, cogging away'- did the man respond to this?
3. Warning: Protect your coordship until Saarang finishes. You are fired==> Bhaand, Saania and I are fired. We are all too old to search for newer volships :)

I'm a gravy hanger !! said...

@ Jimmy : Thy volship is safe although my coordship isnt :P and yes 'the man' did respond to the coggin away part, although on a chat box. the surprising part is even the shaastra design core responded to it on a chat box :)

As a part of newsletter, I think we fear none, unless our grub coupons are threatened :)

Anonymous said...

LOL.A search for akaknksha jain leads to ur page.:)

I'm a gravy hanger !! said...

@Anon : Who the hell in this world will Google Akanksha Jain ? < I presume searching meant googling> But well, you did..Anyway, wanna try a more interesting search term ? Try Saarang 2009 and you'll be pleasantly surprised again !

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