Well, LVC here doesn't stand for Long-Visual-Connect but Long-Verbal-Connect (Note that the earlier statement is only for insti quizzers who would be familiar with LVC like terms. If you aren't one, pardon me but if you aren't and yet know about it, Good for you ! )
The following is my entry for the Newsletter Ed's application for Saarang 2009. Hope you enjoy it ! (The theme also is provided below )
Connect :- Saarang-AJ-Time Machine- Lace-Angelina Jolie- E=mc^2—ACM Turing Prize-Booze-Why so Serious ?
The connection is as follows :-
The preparations had begun in full flow for Saarang 2009 with the people in charge of it slogging away ( in some cases like the Design Team, cogging away). Lace was also one of these guys( and gals) trying to get some sleep as he was trying to fix up the loose ends; the fix here being that he could not tie his own Lace ! But as they say, the Saarang Spons Saga was Lace-d with many such instances, with one of them involving him to order a spons coord to approach the ACM Turing Prize panel to donate the prize money as a Sponsorship amount towards Saarang 2009; as cash resources and time, both were running out. Meanwhile, Lace’s co-Core/C(h)or was being his reSPONSible self ordering AJ on how to go about handling “Public Relations” (read- “How to make their Relation Pub(l)ic “).
Now, it so happens that Alan Turing was known to have a Homo-Genius mix of orientation towards Computers and homosexual practices* (of which I daren’t speak of !)
*Quote misquoted from www.uncyclopedia.org
Hence, the ACM Turing Prize Panel, in accordance with Turing’s final wish, wanted to support homosexuality. Aaand, when they saw the logo of Saarang 2008, they were simply turned ON by it and gave away a huge chunk of the prize money as Sponsorship towards Saarang ’09 only to find that the same money was spent on booze, snuff,etc... So, now that we had cash, Akanksha tried to create a PR stunt by proclaiming to the media (read ‘Newsletter junta’) that AJ was coming to Saarang ‘09; the only glitch being that this stunt flopped worse than Han-Cock. The reason was pretty clear that she didn’t know that she was (in)famously known as AJ^ in IITM whereas the AJ she referred to was Angelina Jolie (or probably Angelina Jolie ‘Pit’t, by the time this piece goes into print).
^- AJ doesn’t stand for Akanksha Jain, but Arrogant Jackass !
This flop disillusioned her about Saarang 09’s look to the public and she was about to resign her Core-ship and offer it to me*** but she was somehow convinced by N2 that even ‘E=mc^2’ was proved only after years of 'hard work' and the same is applicable to Saarang. Well, trust AJ to goof up the simplest of things and she took N2’s words to be as “Hardly working” towards her goal and started boozing until she became a Bo(o)zo !
*** To me, coz she had the best TIME of her life in the most unique TIME machine I gifted her, to create her Moods as per her convenience (now do you get the Time funda ?), on our 7th wedding anniversary .
My friends, That’s the way Saarang 2009 crumbles ! Here I’m, Heath Ledger, Chief Correspondent, Crappy News Network (CNN), signing off . BTW, Why so Serious ??
The existence of this blog is the result of ( or has been results of)incidents which have generically touched the heart of my neighbour(s) (irrespective of where I'm staying) because of the merciless renditions of my "jokes". So if you have rotten tomatoes in your hand, you can throw them at my neighbours or on your screens, whichever you feel is befitting. Turn on, Tune In, Read on !
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
Pleasant Jerks ver 2.0
TTN has become a bit serious with his teaching nowadays ( read, telling lesser PJs per class) but yet we have another gem from his class here :
" I went to a restaurant which had buffet style dinner offering me dal, roti and sabzi kept in different rows. Now, while being served, I got Roti first, which was hot. Hence, good. Next, I was served Dal, which was also hot and hence, that also was good. But. when I was served Sabzi, it was cold. Temme why ? " ...............
"Well the answer is that it was picked up from the 'Sabzi-Row' " :P :P
Well, I know one thing for sure now that I will take up an elective in Industrial Engg. next year if it's continued to be taught by TTN.
" I went to a restaurant which had buffet style dinner offering me dal, roti and sabzi kept in different rows. Now, while being served, I got Roti first, which was hot. Hence, good. Next, I was served Dal, which was also hot and hence, that also was good. But. when I was served Sabzi, it was cold. Temme why ? " ...............
"Well the answer is that it was picked up from the 'Sabzi-Row' " :P :P
Well, I know one thing for sure now that I will take up an elective in Industrial Engg. next year if it's continued to be taught by TTN.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Pleasant Jerks !!
Well, finally I'm dedicating a post to someone -- Prof. TT Narendran (TTN in short). What makes this post special is that I've not sat in a single class of his and yet I'm posting some of his delectable quotes (thanks to my choice of Minor, but well I never knew TTN rocked like this :( ) Following are some of his PJs, not in any particular order :-
"Which element in the Periodic Table can make you feel poor ? " ...... Antimony !!!!
"Which is the only creature apart from human beings having emotions ? ".....Sentipede !!!!!!!
"There were 2 scientists ;- Highf & Daw " Didn't get it ??? It's High-Funda !!! (Pun Intended)
More are to follow as his classes go by ! Wow, now there's a Prof. in IITM who can keep a class going :)
"Which element in the Periodic Table can make you feel poor ? " ...... Antimony !!!!
"Which is the only creature apart from human beings having emotions ? ".....Sentipede !!!!!!!
"There were 2 scientists ;- Highf & Daw " Didn't get it ??? It's High-Funda !!! (Pun Intended)
More are to follow as his classes go by ! Wow, now there's a Prof. in IITM who can keep a class going :)
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